What’s Your Advice?

I get emails every week from desperate parents seeking advice. Many have a son or daughter who’s been arrested. I remind them that I am not a lawyer, nor am I a social worker, psychologist or psychiatrist. I’m simply a father who became angry when my son got sick and I couldn’t get him meaningful help for his mental disorder.

The most common question that I am asked by other parents is:

  How did you get your son to take his medication?

The answer is: I didn’t.

Click to continue…

Brian J. Kelley: My Friend the Spy Expert

Brian Kelley telephoned me shortly after my book,  Confessions of a Spy: The Real Story of Aldrich Ames, was published in 1997 and invited me to lunch. At the time, he was working at the CIA and was especially interested in my trip to Moscow where I had met with the KGB (now called the SVR) and also with the relatives of Soviet General Dmitri Polyakov, one of the CIA’s most important assets until he was exposed and executed.  

Soft spoken, intelligent and personable, Kelley impressed me with his knowledge of the Ames case and his questions about Polyakov. I liked him instantly, but didn’t think much about our lunch until August 1999 when I got a telephone call from a friend who worked at the CIA.

“Brian Kelley has been accused of being a Russian spy?” he declared.

Click to continue…

Death of an Advocate: Glenn Koons

Glenn Koons and Marlee Matlin

 

I first met Glenn Koons when I was invited to speak at a luncheon in Montgomery County, Pa., being hosted by the National Alliance on Mental Illness. It was one of the first speeches that I delivered after publication of my book and before my talk, NAMI Board Member Carol Caruso introduced me to Glenn. I was immediately struck by his easy-going manner. Carol bragged that Glenn was one of the first NAMI trained  Peer-to-Peer mentors in the entire nation. Glenn and I spoke for several minutes and I was impressed by his thoughtfulness and enthusiasm.

Our paths continued to cross during the coming years at various NAMI meetings and conventions. I was always happy to see Glenn and was thrilled when I learned that he had been one of only four NAMI peers who had been invited to the White House by President Obama to celebrate the 20th anniversary of the Americans with Disabilities Act of 1990.   Glenn wrote about the event for a NAMI blog.

A few weeks ago, I was asked by NAMI’s Darcy Taylor to write an article for NAMI’s VOICES publication. In my article, I mentioned three “consumers” who have inspired me. They are  Dr. Fred Frese, Diana Kern, and Glenn Koons. 

The day after I submitted my article, an email arrived telling me that Glenn was dead.

Click to continue…

Cries for help from readers

I get dozens of emails each week from readers who have read CRAZY: A Father’s Search Through America’s Mental Health Madness. Most are from writers who are frustrated and desperate for help. Here are several examples.

The First Letter
 
The hardest thing for me is to convince other family members that our loved has little insight. It’s not that he’s stubborn, lazy, or means to be argumentative, or to even do risk taking behaviors. But, they don’t get it and don’t wish to read literature or research about the brain and how brain disorders affect the function of the brain – mood and thought processes. Nor, do they want to deal with him, because they don’t know how or don’t want to know how. They’ve their own lives and stresses as well. Yet, I ask, would we walk away and further stigmatize a loved one with dementia, Alzheimer’s disease, cancer (including brain cancer), heart disease, Parkinson’s disease, and any number of illnesses including addictions that affect the brain? Would we expect a loved one to break his or her leg without helping them to get proper medical treatment? I’ve not heard from our loved one in two weeks. I’ve sent texts, private messages on Facebook, and called leaving messages, to no avail. The only thing that keeps me even keeled is my involvement with NAMI, and letting our loved one know that I’ve not abandoned him in any way.

Then and Now: A Surprise!

The first car my wife, Patti, bought on her own was a 1969 Karmann ghia that was in awful condition. It was all she could afford in 1979 when she was fresh from college and starting a family with her first husband, Steve, who later died from complications caused by cancer. I noticed one day that she kept a photo in her office that showed her sitting proudly in that piece of junk. The photo was taken in August 1979.

So Tony, my son who loves cars, and I decided to surprise her recently with a completely restored yellow Karmann ghia. It’s a 1970 model.

Sometimes in life, as the old saying goes, “You need to stop and smell the roses.”  Or, in this case, the exhaust.

Happy Labor Day!

August 1979 Picture Karmann Ghia

august 2011

 

Forty Years Later Jail Still Violating Rights

Shortly after my book, CRAZY: A Father’s Search Through America’s Mental Health Madness, was published in April 2006, I received a telephone call from an attorney at the U.S. Department of Justice who asked me about incidents at the Miami Dade County jail that I’d described in my book. The federal investigator was curious about my claims that correctional officers, who worked on the ninth floor of the jail, physically beat inmates. During the ten months that I’d spent doing research at the jail, I had been told several times by officers that I needed to exit the floor “for my own safety” while jailers  “put their hands” on troublesome inmates. When I returned to the cellblock later, I was  able to confirm that guards had gone into cells and beaten inmates. One officer was especially infamous for abusing prisoners.  He bragged about it. At the time, I was surprised at how openly officers talked to me about the beatings.

Last Friday, the Justice Department released a three -year study of the Miami Dade corrections department and the federal investigators’ findings confirm what I first revealed in my book. Put simply, the Miami Dade Pre-trial Detention Center is a living hell on earth for inmates with mental illnesses.

Click to continue…